What Are People of No Faith Looking for in Faith Conversations?

Whether they stem from a place of certainty and presumption or from a place of curiosity and inclusion, opportunities for spiritual conversations are...

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Whether they stem from a place of certainty and presumption or from a place of curiosity and inclusion, opportunities for spiritual conversations are many, Barna’s research suggests.

This article, an excerpt from our latest Spiritually Openrelease—available exclusively in Barna Access Plus—explores how often cross-faith conversations might be occurring and what non-Christians are looking for when having faith conversations with followers of Christ.

Honesty, Care & Understanding—What People of No Faith Hope to Find in Conversations with Christians Relationships between Christians and people of no faith are fairly common—and they often involve talking about Jesus. In fact, 65 percent of people of no faith personally know someone who follows Jesus, and 45 percent say such a peer has talked with them about their Christian faith.

Knowing that cross-faith conversations and friendships are organically occurring, and that they might be catalysts for spiritual openness, it’s wise to examine the intentions, quality and outcomes of these connections.

What do people of no faith hope these spiritual conversations look like?

In our survey, responses are clear: The top thing people look for in a conversation with a Christian is that they “listen without judgment.” People of no faith are also hoping for honesty about questions and doubts, and they don’t want forced conclusions. The best learning environment, they express, is one marked by care and consideration.

Unfortunately, that isn’t always what people of no faith find.

Our survey also probed actual experiences of spiritual conversations and how they were received by people of no faith.

Even within the seemingly warm environment of a casual one-on-one conversation about faith, there are mixed responses when Christians explicitly share about their faith with people of no faith. Notably, people of no faith tend to say they do not want to know more about Jesus after such a conversation or that they do not want to talk about this topic again with their friend. Further, these conversations don’t often promote closeness. While some people do walk away feeling more positively toward Jesus, these conversations are as likely to make someone of no faith feel unheard as heard, as imposed upon as cared for.

These responses remind us that spiritual conversations can’t be divorced from the relationships in which they can occur. When they go poorly or are simply ineffective, it may not only limit curiosity about Jesus but also hinder connection between the individuals.

Given these insights, the task becomes helping Christians learn how to build relationships and have conversations that honor these values and create spaces where there is mutual care, respect and authenticity.

For further findings on what people of no faith are looking for in spiritual conversations with Christians, read “For Good Faith Conversations, Try Talking Less” on Barna Access Plus. An accompanying field guide, “Keys for Better Spiritual Conversations,” offers faith leaders some pointers on how the Church might better equip Christians for healthy conversations with people of no faith. Subscribe to Barna Access Plus to explore the entire Spiritually Open series, which includes in-depth reporting on spiritual openness and evangelism, helpful field guides and exclusive video interviews with experts and practitioners.

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